As I get closer to Friday, I get closer to coming to terms with the fact that MC is moving out and will be at college.
I’ve been slowly getting all the things he needs to be able move in comfortably. He doesn’t make it easy as he is either in a bit of denial himself or just stubbornly thinks he really doesn’t need anything. It doesn’t help that he will be so close and he knows he can just run home if there is something he needs and doesn’t have.
It grates a little on my need to plan and organize this particular aspect.
Also not helping one bit is the fact that it is nearly impossible to get things like isopropyl alcohol around here. That is one of the things that are on my critical sanitizing routine. Not being able to get that is ratcheting up my already high worry levels.
Its hard enough to send your kid off to college for the first time under normal circumstances. There is nothing resembling normal about anything right now.
I’m stressing about making sure he has the ability to keep himself safe while also stressing over the fact that it isn’t mentioned anywhere about whether certain items are provided for in the dorms, like toilet paper (because he has a private bathroom that he doesn’t share with anyone it is a legitimate question). Some days I have the strangest worries.
We joke around about taking over his spot at the table or letting BG use his room for her video meetings when she starts back to class. Then we laugh at the fact that it is going to be so peaceful and quiet when we don’t have to listen to him yelling at whatever game he is playing. Things that predictably get a response, but that we can all laugh about.
The closer we get to Friday, though, the more stressed and emotional I get. Because each day we get closer, the whole thing just gets a little bit more real.
I have to remind myself that he is only living on campus for his first year, basically 9 months, and then he will be back home, and quite possibly adding MCG into the mix if she can get accepted to a school around here as well. Then I have to remind myself that he is 20 minutes away, not hours, and will most likely still come around often.
Those reminders still can’t manage to trick my brain into not being weird about it all. Said brain decided to express how much it was all bothering me (I’m sure also pulling from the family BS of the other day as well) by giving me a lovely dream about being abandoned and forgotten, one of my lovely one’s that are so exceptionally emotional it is still hanging around days later.
I feel like I need to just go sit on a quiet beach somewhere and watch the water. For like a month.
These aren’t open yet. I do have some that are more open, but these just looked really interesting.
It is cold and rainy today, which made for some phenomenal photos, even if it is more crocus. I would have gotten more, but it was actually still misting and I really wasn’t in the mood to get drenched, so I only got a handful. I WILL have some hyacinths for you soon as they are almost open.
As I’m sure many of you are in a similar situation, my state declared a state of emergency. This is a full day after my city did so on its own, without any guidance from further up the government chain. Sadly, my city is doing a better job of actually trying to make a difference in banning certain number of gatherings (though still probably not enough), whereas my state has only made the declaration to free up funding. They have not imposed any restrictions or canceled schools, leaving it up to local heath departments.
Honestly, I’m frustrated by the whole thing. The people at the top that should be guiding the rest of this country in best practices aren’t doing squat, leaving it to those downhill to clean up the mess, but the people downhill aren’t doing any better.
I do my damnedest to keep anything political off my blog, but this is just too much. Where I live, there are no cases in the immediate area, but a few on some of the outer lying areas with more popping up every day. We are in a perfect position to stop or at least slow down this spread, at least in our area, but the people that should be making the decisions to close down schools or other major centers that are basically petri dishes are passing the buck to someone else.
The kids’ school has a plan in place to go online after spring break, but they aren’t making the decision themselves, waiting for someone to tell them they have to. I get that they may not actually have the authority to make those kinds of decisions at the district level, but someone should be stepping up and making the responsible decision.
I really try not to jump into the panic and hysteria, but this isn’t something that people are going to be able to fix or even improve on at an individual level and those that are at high risk shouldn’t be considered disposable because no one wants to step up and make the probably unpopular move to say we should shut all these things down as best we can.
Can we please just be concerned about our fellow humans for a change?
My Iris are almost done for the year. I’m lucky I was able to get the photos I did as the rain and wind did a number on them. I had one dark purple Iris that was blooming for a day that I managed to get a picture of that day and it was on the ground by the following morning after a storm. I’ll have Lilies soon, but I don’t have nearly enough flowering plants in my yard. That may have to change this summer.